Glad to see everyone this morning. I suppose you are wondering why you are here. I do not blame you. I think you have suffered long enough, so today; I bring good news for everyone. I will share it with you right after this important message:
I wish to share an experience with you. As you know, many of us have had brushes with the authorities regarding drinking and driving. Well I for one did something about it. The other night I was out for dinner with some friends and frankly, I had way too much wine. Knowing I was wasted, I did something I had never done before. I took a bus home. I arrived safe and without incident which was a real surprise since I had never driven a bus before.
(Sent to me by Zita)
Ta tump!I have long searched for ways to write and tell better stories. In fact, I searched the nation for a writing program, but to no avail. Then, about a month ago, I happened upon the Southern Methodist University (SMU. Pronounced S’mooo) website. I was delighted to learn the school has a creative writing program, right here in my own city. Well, Dallas anyway. I signed up immediately and ordered my textbook the next day. The program offers a “core curriculum,” a “non-fiction track,” a “children’s book track,” and a “fiction track.” I have ruled out non-fiction for lack of interest. I shall consider the other two at my leisure.
There you have it. In a few months, you will be able to throw away your head massager, headache remedies and extra strength reading glasses. I will produce nothing less than Pulitzer Prize winning, quality prose. You will eventually be glad you stuck it out for all this time. Mebbe. Meanwhile, let me know what you think. Should I devote my golden years to writing children’s stories? Perhaps the children would be less corrupted if I concentrated on fiction for an older audience, less eager to sue. You be the judge.
PS: I hope you do not mind being Guinea pigs for my homework assignments. Heh, heh.
...